


Bloodstained Bedsheets

by OptimisticJamie



Series: Anea Lavellan [2]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Blood, F/M, Loss, Miscarriage, Natural Miscarriage, Pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-14
Updated: 2015-06-14
Packaged: 2018-04-04 07:55:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4130344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OptimisticJamie/pseuds/OptimisticJamie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The white bedsheets were stained, stained a colour Cullen prayed he would never see on their bed in such amounts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bloodstained Bedsheets

**Author's Note:**

> Anea is pronounced "ah-NN-yay"
> 
> I keep seeing heaps of fic’s where the Inquisitor miscarries because of a fight gone bad, but what if it was completely natural?

“Dorian do you know where the Inquisitor is?” Cullen asked the Mage who was currently reclined in a large backed plush armchair in the library of Skyhold.  
Dorian had his feet elevated on the table in front of him, Varric sat across the table, scribbling something in a leather bound journal.

“Our dear Commander wishes to know where his wife is.” Dorian chided, a grin on his face.

“We all know how whipped our Commander is, Dorian.” Varric replied, glancing up from his writing.

Cullen rolled his eyes, growing tired of their teasing. He and Anea had been married for two years, together for much longer. “Do you know where she is?”

Dorian shrugged; “Now that you mention it I never saw her leave your chambers today. I would have thought that sharing the same room would have alerted you to her movements.”

“I was up before first light, drilling the soldiers.” Cullen explained, already leaving the pair to their own devices. He made his way through the main hall, emptier now that Corypheous was dead, but still heavy with Orlesian court nobles. A few of them greeted him as he passed, he bid them a polite nod before continuing on his way, his thoughts too crowded for hello’s.

It was odd for Anea to not leave their quarters, even when ill. It had taken a long time to close the rifts around Thedas, and many remained open. She always jumped at the challenge to butt heads with a demon or square up a dragon with Dorian and Iron Bull, but for her to remind in bed all day was worrying.  
Cullen doubled his speed as he climbed the stairs. As soon as he opened the door to their quarters he knew something was wrong.

He heard a choked sob, cut off quickly by the sound of the opening door. She obviously didn’t want anyone to hear her. He contemplated turning around and returning to his duties, but Josephine needed the Inquisitor’s attention. He slowly climbed the stairs, poking his head up above the floor to try and see Anea.

From what he could see she was sitting on the floor against the bed, facing the open balcony windows that overlooked the gardens. Her hair has grown out over the past five years, no longer cropped short to keep it out of her face it was as long as her hips, the right side closely shaved. It was pulled back in a messy plait, as if she had hurried to get it out of the way.

Cullen entered the room, he could now see her sitting with her head back against the bed, but it wasn’t her that got his attention.

The white bedsheets were stained, stained a colour Cullen prayed he would never see on their bed in such amounts. Blood. Dried blood. He noticed the pattern was messy, as if Anea had spilled a vial of the stuff onto the bed and tried to spread it around, he could see her finger trails through the stains.

He swallowed, a hard lump forming in his throat suddenly. “Anea?” He said quietly, walking around to approach her.

She was sitting with her legs straight out in front of her. She was nude from the waist down, blood had dried against her skin and tears had dried against her face. She turned her eyes to him when he crouched in front of her, bringing a hand up to her cheek.

Fresh tears rolled down her cheeks and she sniffed so forcefully her chest shuddered. She grabbed the wrist of Cullen’s hand against her cheek and turned her face into his palm.

“What happened love?” He asked quietly.

Anea took a shuddering breath before opening her mouth to speak. In her grief she answered in Dalish, sobs breaking her speech. Cullen’s chest constricted painfully as he saw the anguish that she must have endured earlier return. He cupped her other cheek with his free hand.

“Please, love. Tell me.” He prompted.

“C-Cullen, it’s……it’s gone.” She sobbed loudly, curling into herself, arms wrapped protectively around her abdomen.

Cullen’s mouth went dry. “What? Y-you can’t be serious?” He felt stupid for saying it, the evidence was stained into their sheets, dried on her legs, and on her breeches and smalls that he had noticed next to her.

Anea cried harder and rocked back and fourth. Cullen gathered her in his arms, his own tears beginning to fall.

“I…t-tried everything t-this….time.” Anea sobbed, gripping the fur of Cullen’s surcoat. He had removed his amour to have it polished by Harret earlier that day. He curled around Anea. “E-everything V-V-Vivinne told…me”

Cullen hushed her gently, his sobs joining Anea’s. She threw her head back and wailed loudly, Cullen was certain everyone in Skyhold could hear but at that moment he didn’t care. Anea took a deep shuddering breath and wailed again, her pain leeching into his bones, numbing his senses.

It took him a moment to realize she was shaking. He hugged her tighter as her wails grew quiet, grew into shuddering breaths and small sobs. Cullen still didn’t let her go.  
The sound of the door opening alerted them both to an arrival. Josephine climbed the stairs and stopped short, obviously shocked by the sight of the blood.

“Inquisitor?” She questioned, looking at Cullen for an explanation. He just shook his head unhelpfully.

Josephine walked around the bed, giving the object a large perimeter and stood next to Cullen. Anea lifted her head up to look at the ambassador.  
Josephine’s own eyes grew damp as she connected the dots.  
“I’m sorry.” She whispered. Anea squeezed her eyes shut and sobbed again, once into Cullen’s neck.

They weren’t sure when Josephine left, but soon after she returned with Vivinne.

“Oh, sweetheart, don’t sit there any longer you’ll catch ill.” Vivinne prompted, walking over to where Cullen and Anea sat wrapped up in each other. “Commander, draw a bath for our Inquisitor. Josie and I will strip the sheets and clean the floor.”

Cullen hadn’t noticed the blood on the floor. He stood up, carrying Anea to the washroom. Within minutes he had a bath drawn and was helping her out of her remaining clothes and into the bath.

Her tears had stopped but she hadn’t looked at him since he entered.  
“Speak to me, love.” He pleaded.

She sniffed once and released a shuddering breath. “I’m so sorry. I lost it. It’s my fault.”

Cullen felt like someone had punched him. “It is not your fault, love. These things happen.”

“But the first time…five years ago…I decided to clear out Emprise of Red Templar shems, remember?” She explained.

Cullen nodded. He remembered well. She had told him she was pregnant, she had barely begun to show when she was needed in Emprise du Lion. An ambush had caused her to miscarry.  
“That time was an accident. You couldn’t have known about the ambush.”

“But if I had just stayed here it wouldn’t have happened, then I wouldn’t have spent my morning crying on the floor trying to wipe away the evidence so you wouldn’t see.” Anea’s voice was quiet. “If I was more responsible then–”

“Stop. Anea stop it.” Cullen said firmly. He took her cheek in his hand and turned her head so she was looking at him. “It is not your fault.”

Anea searched his face for any indication of blame. There was none. Tears rolled down her cheeks slowly as she leaned in to kiss him sweetly.

“I still love you. Nothing will change that.” He whispered into her ear when they broke away.

He helped her wash herself and dress in fresh clothing. When they exited the washroom Vivinne and Josephine had finished changing the bedsheets. The soiled ones lay in a pile in the corner, Josephine had sent for sweets from the kitchens. Pastries bought from Val Royaux from the last supply trip now sat on Anea’s desk.

Josephine came forward and wrapped Anea in her arms, hugging her a little too tightly but Anea was too spent to complain. Vivinne picked up the soiled sheets; “I’ll take these to the maids. I won’t tell them whose they are to spare you the gossip.”

Anea mouth a thank you over Josephine’s shoulder. The ice Mage descended the stairs quietly.

When Josephine pulled away she smiled to Anea who replied with a small, weak smile of her own. Josephine spoke; “meetings can wait. I’ll send for Leliana or Dorian to check on you later.” With that she left.

Anea sat on the edge of the bed, her shouldered slumped, looking at the food on the desk. Cullen sat next to her.

After a few moments she pressed her back to his side. “I’m sorry.” She said once again quietly.

“There’s no need for you to be.” He responded, matching her tone before kissing the crown of her head.


End file.
